Daily I am staggered by the things people will say under the protection of a username that they wouldn’t say in real life. This is probably bothering me more than normal because of the Cincinnati Zoo news stores and of course all the political coverage that we’re going to have to endure for a lot longer than I really want to.
What happened to “if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all?” When did we become a society of judge-y, b*tchy, d*cks?
I believe in a collective consciousness that connects all of us, so when we’re an a** under a pen name we’re sending that vibration right back to ourselves. No wonder we’re so angry. We keep feeling the pain we’re sending into the world. Can you imagine the power we would feel if instead we were human and decent to each other?
If your first reaction to reading a news story is to become self righteous and jump to comments and spew hate, them maybe you should disconnect from the internet for a very long time and remember what it’s like to be a human.
If I was not a mom I would never leave my house. Half of you just rolled your eyes and thought this statement was hyperbole but it’s not. Ask my husband. Ask my sister. They will tell you I can be completely content to be a hermit (the fact that I have a husband is still a minor miracle to me but don’t tell him I think he’s special).
BC (before child), I was happy to spend an entire weekend in the house without human contact living with just my characters for company. But now I’m have this little person with me all the time (seriously like a limpet all the time!) who isn’t content to be alone. She has friends. I marvel at this because when I was a kid I didn’t. She’s a mystery to me in that way (notice the way I kind worked in my radio show title – you should check it out here).
So when she came along I had to force myself to go out and talk to people. Put her in classes. Take her to girl scouts. You know – be a mom!
Well, it change me. A lot. I am not the same person I was seven years ago. I know what you’re thinking there is no way I changed that much and that I must fundamentally be the same person. No I am not.
I talk to people now. That doesn’t sound like a big deal but I never talked to anyone I didn’t know seven years ago. Even if I did know you I would have had to know you for a couple years before really feeling comfortable enough with you to speak.
Not any more.
Now I will talk to anyone about anything and it’s wonderful. I now have so many opportunities coming my way because I am no longer afraid to talk to people. Heck seven years ago me hosting a talk show speaking to best selling authors would have been an joke to me. I would have thought yeah right that’s going to happen. I couldn’t have opened my mouth let alone asked these people things. Now I have a talk show (seriously you should check it out here) and I have spoken to bestselling authors including Sandra Brown, Hank Phillipi Ryan Iris Johansen and JA Jance. Can you believe it?! Because I still can’t. But I am very grateful!
I marvel at how far I’ve come in such a short time. And I directly attribute all of this to the birth of my daughter. She has taken me outside my comfort zone on many occasions and I have to admit, I am better off for it.
Actual conversation in my office today:
“Is your space heater on?”
“Because I’m cold.”
“It’s not cold in here.”
This happens all the time. I think running the space heater is universally understood to mean someone is cold, so this conversation always seems like a pointless waste of my time.
I should probably start out the conversation by blurting out, “I have Hashimotos disease and I can no longer regulate my own body temperature.” That might save me from a lot of bizarre encounters where other people try to convince me that I can’t be cold because they’re not.
To all the well meaning among you please let me assure you that 1) I am cold 2) you telling me you’re hot will not change the fact that I’m cold and 3) I really am COLD so get over it.
No where in the above conversation did I say it was cold in the room. NO! I said I am cold. It’s a personal thing. I am not judging you for sweating all over my desk so don’t judge me if I need to put on a sweater and run my space heater.
Why do you think I care if you disagree with the FACT that I am cold? Why do you think I care about anything you have to say about my personal choices? If I want to wear a snowsuit when it’s 90 damn degrees outside what business is it of yours?
Please let me thank you for all the unsolicited advice. Please know that I’ve heard you. I know what you are saying to me. But I still don’t care. I am cold.